Eating With Purpose

February 12, 2015
Eating With Purpose
My eating has changed in more ways than the obvious. I am eating food that is nutritious and nourishing for my body and in proper portions. I am eating four times a day. But there is so much more to it.

I am present when I eat and I am very aware of what I am eating and how I eat.

I don’t know when it happened, or if I had always been like this, but I ate with very little thought to what I was doing. Sure, I could taste my food, and I thought I enjoyed it, but I ate my food so quickly and usually with distraction.

I never laid utensils down in the middle of a meal. If eating finger food I’m sure I kept it in my hands at all times. I took large bites and didn’t waste too much time chewing. I didn’t even maintain proper posture and I leaned into my plate. It’s as though I was in a silent race to consume as much food as possible in the shortest amount of time.

As I sit here and reflect upon this, I think about what food meant to me and how I used it. I’m an emotional eater and I have always used food to self medicate. I celebrated with it, but I also soothed myself with it and and comforted myself with it. It became very mindless.

If some deep place within myself thought that food could fix my brokenness, fill my emptiness, and heal the holes within my heart and soul, then it makes sense that I would subconsciously try to replace what was missing with food.

In this transformation that I am undertaking, I am becoming purposefully attentive and decisive about everything I do, my thoughts, my actions, the words I use, my choices in food and and how I eat my food.

I am eating every meal and snack seated at the table. I am eliminating all distractions, no television, computer or telephone. I sit down, I look at the food before me and pause. I pray and take the time to be thankful for this food and to ask for it to nourish and fuel my body. There is no hurry, no rush. I take small bites of food and take the time to really savor, chew and enjoy the taste and flavor. I set my utensil down as I chew. I pause and drink some water before resuming. I sit up tall and aware of my posture. It’s a long process.

Every meal takes a lot of thought and effort on my part. This is a completely new way for me to eat and think about my food. The first time, I was amazed at how long it took me to eat one egg with spinach and an apple. And I was satisfied, and proud of myself.

I know over time all of these very deliberate choices and methodical activities will become more natural for me. In the meantime I am learning so much more about myself and I’m finding more tools to use in my journey. I am taking control of my life. I am no longer just a passenger. I am becoming the pilot of my life.